My role as a mom is closely tied to my work. Not just because I usually create paintings that portray moments from childhood, but because my kids are ever-present during the process.
People are often surprised when they find out that over half of the digital paintings I've made so far were created with a baby asleep in my lap with my iPad carefully balanced on a nursing pillow.
Sometimes I work on the kitchen table in squeezed-in moments between requests for snacks and diaper changes.
There are occasional times I get "in the zone" while sneaking a few minutes to paint on my bed with the tablet propped up on my pillow. This usually means letting the kids completely run amok in the house. Oh, what epic messes that come from those sneaky blissful moments to myself... 😅
To be honest, most days, I'm just too tired to paint by the time things are quiet and stress-free (this only happens after bedtime), so I wait for the next chance and I opt to rest instead. Some paintings have taken many months (or even yeeears) to finish because I’ve just been wiped out and discouraged by the feeling like none of my time is my own
I used to struggle (and still do at times) with the feeling that I'm not a "real" artist because of this limited time for my art. It's tricky to create consistent work when you have young kids that you stay home with, and I'm so much less productive and prolific than other the myriad of other illustrators out there.
Social media outlets only work to compound that feeling as you can endlessly scroll through millions of artwork posts. While hanging out in these places, it’s easy for a slow moving “art mom” to feel lost in the shuffle. (I’m looking at you, Instagram!)
I’ve even had times when I’ve doubted myself and felt awkward calling myself an “artist” because I didn’t seem to put out enough work.
BUT!!
By God’s grace, I’ve come to realize three important truths about those "less-than" feelings that crop up:
1. Comparison is a trap that robs you of your sense of your intrinsic worth.
You lose out on recognizing what you have to offer the world when you see yourself as less capable, valuable, or worthy. No one can take that from you but you. Don't give it away by looking at other people and measuring your accomplishments against them.
2. It’s not about the "artist" title anyway. Who cares?
How I feel about how “legit” I am doesn't really matter in the long run. What’s more important to focus on is what inspires me, what I'm making with that inspiration, and what I want to say through it. My true goal in my creative work is to pour my heart and soul into work that I love, and to spread joy to people through my paintings. That’s it!
3. Balance is better than productivity.
When I slow down to think about it, I’m actually happy with going slow in this crazy season of life. Sure, I have days when I wish I had more time to myself to paint, but when I think about it, I'd rather have happy, healthy kids with a mom who is present for them than a booming but all-consuming art career. There's a healthy middle ground, and I'm happy to get there at my own peaceful pace.
The best part of being an artist mom is getting to show them what I do. They get to see the things I see as I share my pieces with them. They're constantly teaching me how to be more openly creative and imaginative. (Seriously, I think they're better artists than me.)
I'll keep on whittling away at my pieces in the cracks of life, letting life itself be my inspiration, and enjoying the satisfaction of gradual progress and a finished piece here and there. I hope this encourages other creative parents out there to keep going! You've got this! Let your kids enjoy seeing you make something you're proud of and inspire them to do the same.
Blessings,
Rachel